7.22.2010

August itinerary

7/26 - 8/6= staffing kids' farm camp and African dance theater camp at Orchard Hill Farm (NH)
8/6 - 8/8= Daughters of the Earth gathering at Earthlands (MA) (I need a ride down from NH, if you know anyone...)
8/9 - 8/14?= Earthstory gathering at Earthlands (MA) (and then I need a ride up to northern VT, if you know anyone...)
8/15 - 8/21= Vision Quest (VT) 
final two weeks of the month... don't know yet. I will probably hangout with Luz Elena in Brattleboro, VT. I want to see Keith, Mira, Efan, Jason, Kalyan, Darcey, and Sean sometime this summer, too. I also want some kind of backpacking / survival camping trip. So, hopefully a small extended visit to Keith's farm and/or Kalyan's new farm, too. 
... and then I plan to return to Connecticut before September 5 for the Red Tent that day, and then start Two Coyotes' autumn children's programs on September 6! 

7.15.2010

desires

i really wanted!
to return to the desert
and work with "at-risk" youth
beautiful shining teenagers that society can't yet accept
and learn from plant-man doug
and a bunch of burros
and cacti 
and mountains
and a sky so big and wide
that my heart floods with blue
that merges with red
into the most vivid healing purple i've ever seen
as the hot desert rocks boom their deep booms 
and i know that 
we are held

i really wanted! 
to stay here and cultivate 
the relationships and seeds that i've set
and slowly watched sprout 
and am still blossoming 
so much love for so many people 
yet so often feeling so very 
alone 
and struggling
with restlessness and wants and needs and boundaries
boundaries 
don't cross my boundaries 

i am learning to see my boundaries 
and bravely state them when i need to
no more hiding them 
no more hiding 

i am stepping out into the sunshine 
from a morbid smoggy winter 
and sweating beads of mingled pain and pleasure 
the raw honesty of being alive and whole
with black, white, and all rainbow prismatic every nothings
swirled into a giant
center of the universe
cake!
cake

i really wanted!
yes i did! 
and i still do 
but i am learning

thank you

thank you 
for listening and watching and knowing and seeing
and holding and being
and being
just being 

thank you 
for all the prayers seen and unseen,
heard and unheard
for i feel them every time i cry into the wind
and she blows back with a kiss
and i know 
that i am blessed
with seen and unseen 
heard and unheard

thank you 
friends everywhere 

7.03.2010

yes love

watching bats fly around at dusk
minnows gathering around my toes and nibbling them
while i am swimming in ice pond
of all places!
yes, ice pond
clouds pink, sky blue
back out into the great known unknown beautiful
yes

6.23.2010

saint johnswort

today was a saint johnswort day!
hypericum perforatum 
"perforatum" for the small dots that light filter thru on the leaves
the flowers smell like heaven and will help further repair the ripped-up side of my face (from the Fall)
how does such a little yellow flower work such strong magic? 
i am in love!!

this is summer: june and july plans

if anyone's interested...

my itinerary for the next couple weeks:
this weekend= "ancient and innovative foundations training" with luz elena morey in brattleboro, vt
next week (last week of june)= either camp in woodbridge, ct with justin or visiting friends near northampton, ma
1rst week july= "gaia nature arts camp" for 5-7 yr olds with luz elena morey in brattleboro, vt
that weekend= maybe red tent in hartford, ct; or camping on keith's farm near northampton, ma
2nd week july= housesitting/exploring near brattleboro, vt
3rd week july= "gaia nature arts camp" for 8-12 yr olds with luz elena morey in brattleboro, vt
final week of july= still open

and then aug is mostly open, until aug 20 is women's herbal conference... and i think i will hitch around maine for a bit and explore some mountains i haven't touched yet, check out a high point, dip in the ocean for a few days, etc (mount desert island...!)

pow wow!

the order and preservation of indigenous cultures 
a gathering of tribes, really
disconnected yet (re)connected

the rhythm of the heartbeat drum just sets my heart beating faster
and then slower again
as we attune to the drum 
and attune to each other 
we begin to notice 
our voices coming from a shared breath
of the same quality of air and breathing 
into the nose, down into the belly, out thru the mouth
to be shared some more 
with the trees and fields surrounding
and the eagle soaring above 
riding on that same air current 
of precious breath
gift friend air wind 
take us as we soar 
on air currents of drum song

old songs, new songs, so many songs!
i recorded most
but it will take quite a while for me to really remember them 
for now, three are stuck in my head
seems like every other moment though
i remember another song
and find myself humming yet another pow wow tune
as i toodle around the woods and observe mosses growing
(that same beat thrums in you too huh?) 

many of the songs don't have a literal meaning 
but the feeling that the song evokes
that is what is important 
that is what is intentional
not the words
the words come secondary to the feelings 
yes!

and then at night we women gathered around 
the red clover womens' drum 
for me, it doesn't quite matter who i'm drumming with
so long as we get attuned
and the magic happens 
but there's just something about all us women gathered together
with a drum without a drum 
but ooh that night yes with a drum 
and drumming and singing and laughing and sharing
shining eyes reflecting the stars
with shared hands beating the sacred ancient drum 
something magic
is still here 
and reawakening 
yes!

6.21.2010

questions

to hitch or not to hitch?
that is the question
in a state of too many cars and not enough real people
real
people
i have many questions