on goodbye

it's rare to be the one
getting said goodbye to
being on this side of the river
i know now why my grandma was crying
when she dropped me off at the bus station
when i left for china
for 3 months
i hope she's not sad
that i haven't returned yet
but once i return
perhaps after another 3 months
i will leave again
leaving her on the other side of the river again
where i am standing now
having waved my friend away
a motorbike into the distance
the sound fading away, the sight already gone
but the heart ties still there
how strong, the heart ties?

i don't like being on this side of the river
waving goodbye
and now i feel guilty for usually being the one on the other side of the river
jolly waving farewell
looking forward into the rising sun
whilst the moon sets on the back side of the river
where i stand now
still waving
pieces of my heart riding away with the motorcycle

grandma, mother, father, sister, friends who are family
i want to say "come join me on this side of the river"
and "let us never part"
and "why do i always say goodbye"

today i know
yet again
that i do not know

but there is a certain wind
and there is a certain earth
and the chinese word for peace
is the same word for

(let us live the questions
let us not be afraid to walk into the fiery sun
be it rising or setting
and to grasp the tails of the comets
and ride them as far as they will take us
let us bravely stand at the edges of volcanoes
and stare deep into an endless abyss
great cavernous mysterious eyes that stare back
let us be
waves on this immense ocean
flowing steady wild rhythmic uncontrollable
gravitationally pulled to solid earth magnetism
and drawn by mystical moon off somewhere we can't quite always see)