yes

"so you're not a local?" he asks

i smile

"where are you from?"

today, i say i come from taiwan

"do you think taiwan is better, or china?"

i say both have their highs and lows, like any other place on earth

"but doesn't taiwan have more money?"

i laugh. money doesn't bring happiness right?

we look out over the landscape of rows of crops lined into the rows of trash, wedged among the broken buildings with new buildings under construction and skyscrapers in the background, smoke rising from two piles of trash and the dull roar of traffic in the distance

"but life is harder with less money"

but it doesn't matter where you go in the world. it's all the same. everywhere, people experience immense joy and deep contentment. everywhere, people experience immense sadness and deep pain. everywhere, we go through life one day after the next, and we all try our best to live it to its fullest potential.

he looks me in the eyes. his eyes are bright. i like the crinkled corners, bearing years of laughter and tears, and endess stories, "you are so young. i am glad you see this."

my heart rises over the crops, roof, and even airplane.

we understand each other.

letter to students

i'm having trouble composing what feels like a suitable "china-synopsis" letter to share with you all, regarding my journey here in china over the past three months... this morning, sitting on the train and sharing old music with students, watching the landscape roll by so quickly, a letter came... for my students. it sums up a few of my feelings regarding being here. maybe another letter will come before i leave china... and maybe not. i hope you enjoy this one :) (note: i wrote this for my students)

- jiling

---
barbie, maria, patrick, seon woo, dae yeong, jose, jamie, edwin, akane, tony, sok hwan, seonjin, carly, nakyung, emily, jiho, jisu, dickson, anthony, will...

21 students. i know. we keep counting and recounting to make sure you're all still here. 21 individuals. 21 teenagers around ages 16-17 in grade 11, taking a really heavy courseload of difficult classes, and spending one precious week with us and a school, a village--- an experience in a small village in the relative backwaters of china--- changing lives, moving hearts, and re(creating) your own young lives.

who ARE you? you'll ask this question an infinite number of times throughout your life--- you'll ask yourself, your family, friends, strangers. you've experienced this question as hordes of small children flock to touch your shoulders, shake your hands, give you a hug, as for your autograph. how do you answer to "who ARE you?" what do you see when you look into your own eyes in the mirror? when you look into the eyes of the "other"--- loved ones, strangers--- who do you see in there? and, who is reflected back?

kayaking is and was not just kayaking. going blindfolded through the jungle, you're not just trying to "see" with your feet, and illuminate your sense of hearing. the stones you trip over, the waves that seek to wash over you--- how do you get over them? because, you have done this. you know how to do this. you have an irrepressible strength that carries you through all your young (highly brave, highly inspiring) travels. you carry a bright pearl inside of you that no dust of this world will ever cover up, because you can see it. you KNOW it is there. even when you think you forget, well no--- it's still there. it's always been there.

who ARE you? (more amazing and full of Heart than even you could ever imagine).

xing'an, this trip, is only a small chapter of a long story. what is next? well ofcourse twelfth grade, and then for most (all?) of you, college. and then...?

you've traveled. you're lucky to know the triumphs and challenges of many realities of this life: saying goodbye (metaphorical deaths) to loved ones, beloved places, and the comfortable securities of routines, familiar faces and places, etc--- and then the bittersweet (oftentimes brief) hellos again. you know different cultures: different traditions, different ways of looking at the world, different languages--- but (somehow) basically we're all the same. you know more than i could ever (possibly) even imagine because the complexities of our minds and individual experiences wrap together into beautiful dances, each time unique and utterly indescribable... all this language only an attempt at describing the indescribable (how am i doing?)

i'll try to be more literal--- i've loved every moment with you "kids." (in some ways, already more adult than i will ever be). i have renewed hope for our future, and trust in our youth (that's you! our youth. our future... wow, yeah?) i see beautiful visions for the future with all your bright eyes, bright faces, and bright optimism in your young lives.

"BE the CHANGE you wish to see in this world," said gandhi.

you're so much fun, so full of life and light, and more--- i'm grateful for this week with you young world-changers, beauty-bringers, and laughter-sharers. i'm grateful to you for so bravely walking your strengths into this world... and encourage you to continue looking as deeply inwards as you look outwards. so much beauty in every direction...

thank you

兴安- more images

the family- i traveled with the mama (left) and papa (right) for a weekend to visit their old home (老家) in conghua (从化）
they grew up in the countryside, knowing each other as kids, then later moved out into the city of shenzhen (深圳） for a better life... know these people thru taiwan friend alder :) big gratitude. not pictured, but pictured at some other time: their kids. amazed at the tight knit family community, and how when they go back home to their old town, they just jump right back into the village life: the mama's family processes medicinal herbs as a family business; the papa's family farms

the rooftops- eye over xin'an (兴安). this was my view from my window in xin'an. these old chinese wooden buildings can last for such a long time. they remind me of old barns in new england. (bill, is your barn over 100 years old?) a melding of old and new: construction everywhere, all over china. this old town is getting torn down and rebuilt in places to create a new tourist industry here. most of the population are farmers and construction workers. bamboo harvesting and cultivation is huge here. chopstick and other bamboo manufacturing taking place night and day. landscape here like in connecticut woods... many people fit into the landscape, but a great majestic landscape also. rivers everywhere. wetness. trees and so much life in the forest. jungle, really. humans have greatly altered this landscape. most of the hills covered with cultivated bamboo trees

the kids- an example of my (teenage) students' interactions with the local (elementary school) students... the local students thought the world of our students. treated them like heroes. asked for our autographs every moment they could. give one autograph, and we immediately get mobbed by children wanting more autographs. we play games, paint a mural on their wall, teach some english, give them lots of time and attention... and the kids connect so deeply with these students within the small space of three mornings... that by the time we leave the school at the end of our journey, there is not a dry eye among our students or staff. our students are reluctant to leave the school, and the local kids hang onto our students. everyone is crying tears of joy, tears of sadness, tears of connection and farewell, tears of being deeply moved by something indescribable... profound moment. so grateful to these children. always so grateful to them. moments like this make every challenge feel worthwhile

the forest- the girl- this was one of my favorite places to come sit and be in xin'an. i didn't make a photo of my absolute favorite place, which was where all the previous photos of the plants came from (except for the mossy sorrel photo). but here, i love the bamboo. i loved their knocking sounds when wind strongly blows them together. i love the gentle sounds of the soft yet tough leaves as wind moves through the forest. you can hear when wind enters forest, and exactly where she enters from. love looking up and watching the various small birds and identifying which beautiful sound came from which beautiful bird. i love the dragonflies and butterflies winging about. and then at night... oh, the fireflies!!! (magic in its most primal form)

兴安- look down

yesterday, said goodbye to most of my coworkers as we left them in guilin
today, said goodbye to the rest of my coworkers
today, goodbye to a home of two weeks in xin'an, beautiful china countryside enveloped by mountains
goodbye to villagers i have come to know by their smiles and kindness
and ciau ciau bella to my talented brave teenage students of a week
they, a tearful farewell yesterday to the local elementary school students
tomorrow, i bid kendal farewell
tomorrow, adieu to my home base of three months here in shenzhen
tonight, a farewell to a circle of strangers-turned-friends united by me and kendal

why do we fall in love
and then say goodbye
so painfully?

love of varying degrees yes
but love nonetheless

4:30 am

i hear the first bird of the dawn chorus

another bird answers

tentatively

and then with excitement

a third bird joins in

what

a

sky

the fullening moon had brightened

the entire night sky

and now

all this birdsong

sends night dispelling quivers of

springtime flowers

and more birdsongs on the wind

through my barred window

breaking down the bars

grassroots style

i can smell the rain

how can one sleep

when one's bags are completely packed

and so much awaits on the horizon

as all the birds

begin

to sing alive the sun?

cucumbers

just a normal day on the job... :)

we're heading to xin'an (above guilin) for the next two weeks
then back to shenzhen for 5 days
then june 1= wings sprout me to thailand, and kendal back to usa

big M

me and kendal have been in china for 3 months

sprout

- soak the beans in a glass jar for 2-3 days... until they start to sprout and are chewy and soft. during this process, change water every morning and night.
- find a basket. lay down a soft porous cloth like linen or cotton (cheesecloth is great). i used a bandanna
- pour your beans into basket!
- every morning and night, give beans a bath. otherwise, let them sit there all day in a room temperature out-of-sun place. covered with another cloth that you rubber band or rope to the basket, so that it doesn't fly away, and no curious bugs get in
- wait and watch... it will take about a week. you can munch them all along the way
- yum!!!