2.02.2012

Heartsong


Hello, dear ones! 

I want to share a story with you. This story originates from the forests of Connecticut, as received by fellow nature educator, Justin Pegnataro. After leaving Connecticut, I have continued to share this story as I walk my winding walk. The story has evolved, as stories do. I have adapted Justin's story, from the land of Connecticut, into the written story below- may you read it out loud and share with dear friends, a special younger/ older person, and complete strangers. May you enjoy this story, and share your own!  

With love, 
Jiling 

朋友們
我寫了一篇故事。 我不想要翻譯, 因為翻譯起來, 會很不好聽!但是, 這個故事很特別。 我每次聽了這個故事都會全身發抖。 這個故事來至Connecticut和我 的好朋友Justin。 我離開Connecticut以後, 繼續分享故事。 故事也就慢慢改變了。底下的故事是我的基玲版故事!如果你想要聽故事, 請不要用Google翻譯。。。 請來找我, 我親自跟你講故事!
祝你這新的龍年天天發現生活中充滿了美妙和神秘的東西, 讓你天天開心, 大笑, 忍不住的在跳舞! 
感恩, 
基玲
---

Once upon a time, a long time ago, when all the world was still dark, there lived a little bird named Ji. Unlike other creatures content with crawling, flying, and bumbling through the darkness, Ji could no longer stand flapping around in the oppressively endless blackness, bumping into trees and strangers, confusing friends with food, and forever getting lost. She was convinced that there must be a better way of life, but knew no other alternatives besides the life that she led. One day, while trying to fly as high as possible to seek an opening in the Sky, Ji crashed into a massive mountain and went rolling down, down, down over cold ice and sharp stones. Crumpled onto the Earth, her body twisted, bleeding, and broken, Ji cried and cried, feeling painful, hopeless, and frustrated. Grandfather Turtle crawling through the forest heard her cries. My dear most beautiful beloved, called out Turtle, Why are you crying so sadly? “I am stuck! I am broken! I am suffocating! gasped Ji, “I CANNOT live in such darkness! Turtle crawled over, and tenderly cleaned and bound up Jis wounds. My dear most beautiful beloved, crooned Turtle,when I was your age, a long long time ago, my Great-Grandmother told me that there is a Sun that brings light to the Sky. Great-Grandmother said that only the most beautiful song in the world can call out Sun. Ji sat up straight, her breath caught in her throat, I will find and sing the most beautiful song on Earth. I will call out Sun.
Before her wounds were even completely healed, Ji set off on her journey to find the most beautiful song on Earth. She swam to the bottom of the deepest Oceans, learning all the songs of all the fishes, sea plants, and waters. She clambered to the tops of the highest Mountains, learning all the songs of all the birds, trees, plants, stones, and winds. She learned the songs of the newborn, songs of the sick and dying, songs of joy, and songs of pain. She learned the songs of all the four-legged, two-legged, crawling, flying, jumping, swimming creatures of Earth, Sky, Water, and even bacteria. Ji journeyed up to the icy North, down to the hot South, and all the way around the windy East until she landed back in the windy West. Every day, Ji sang a new song, each song more beautiful than the next. But, Sun still did not appear. The world was still as dark as it had ever been. Most creatures did not understand Jis journey, though some were sympathetically helpful. Though she was often ridiculed, Ji persevered in her quest to find the most beautiful song on Earth, and call out the Sun.
After seven years, Ji had circumnavigated, re-circumnavigated, and re-re-circumnavigated the whole world in search of new songs, stories, and ideas. One day, she found herself once more at the base of the Mountain that she had crashed into and so traumatically plummeted down, years ago. Exhausted from all her journeying, Ji fell into a deep sleep. After four days of dreamless sleep, Grandfather Turtle came ambling into Jis dreams. My dear most beautiful beloved, he called out,just sing. Wake up! Just sing. Ji woke up, well-rested, and empty. Letting go of all the songs that she learned, all the known songs of the world, she began to sing. Ji sang from the deepest recesses of her Heart. Her voice, at first cracked and tired, grew stronger as she drew breath from the deepest core of her belly. Her song, at first unsteady and questioning, grew stronger as she drew powerful infinite melodies from the deepest core of her Heart. Other birds in a nearby forest, startled from their bumbling in the darkness, stopped to listen to Jis singing. They had never heard such a beautiful song before. Intrigued, inspired, and excited, they too began singing from their Hearts. More birds in a further forest heard the singing, and like a powerful spark, were also incited into singing from their Hearts. The song grew louder and more powerful as and more and more birds joined the singing. Soon, all of the birds from every direction on the entire Earth were all joyously singing their Heart Songs, drawing deep full breaths from their core center, and drawing deep full songs from their heart center. No one had ever heard such music before! And then it begins with a small reddish glow that slowly illuminates the bleak blank blackness, slowly drawing never-before-seen outlines into existence. Everything begins glowing, until there is an uncontrollable shaking on the horizon, colors begin exploding and dancing, and eyes must be shielded and arms must be thrown open in celebration, as the brightest, most illuminatingly beautiful Sun bursts flaming into existence to greet the brightest, most illuminatingly beautiful song on Earth, the Song of the Heart.

1.23.2012

恭喜新年快樂!!! Happy Lunar New Year!!!

May you find strength in letting go of attachments, surrendering to the Universe, and going with the flow. 
May you see below the surface. 
May you remain grounded in that which sustains you. 
May you walk with integrity and clarity with your visions and values. 
May you clearly hold sacred space for each moment. 
May you stop often, notice the beauty of all the little things that you'd otherwise run by, marvel at this gift of life, and give thanks. 
May you personalize your wardrobe, decorate your house, speak your mind, dance on the roof, and be authentically you. 
May you open your arms, raise your head up to the sky, lift up your chest, laugh, and howl at the Moon rising behind the clouds. 
May you enjoy all the magic and beauty that this life has to offer as we walk together into the fresh and glowing unlimited potential of this bright new year that our ancestors have been talking about for such a long time. 
Welcome, 2012. 
May you walk in beauty. 
AAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

1.13.2012

turned on women

photo courtesy of Efan Hsieh, and little old camera! 

National Taiwan University of the Arts- after Thursday night contact improvisation dance jam- hanging on trees, eating chia-coconut-orange-hemp-peanut-yum and admiring cloudy moon, laughing loudly and raucously, and then playing with sparkling firecrackers- reliving childhood in the Motherland of Taiwan with my non-blood-but-very-heart-sister! 

1.11.2012

dancing on Earth and Air

just completed my final dance performance for this school term
has been my first time auditing so many college level courses... i have been a full-time part-time audit-student for 3 dance classes, 2 anatomy classes, and a spattering of other classes here and there 
did homework and completed my finals just like the normal students 
and today was my final dance final 
in which we had to choose four lines of a Baudelaire poem
commit it to memory 
choose a fitting piece of music below 3 minutes to choreograph and dance to 
and then perform in front of the class 

after the performance, i am all shaky
my breathing is shaky, my heart is shaky, and my whole body is visibly trembling 
i have moved in more ways than one 
i feel like i have never before trembled this violently on a stage environment 
the anxiety comes from loving my teacher so much 
i really love and respect teacher Wu, this has been my favorite out of ALL of my classes these past four months (i love it even more than my acupuncture class!), and i wholeheartedly want to do justice to teacher Wu's teachings, my body's capacity, and Baudelaire's poetry 
the funny thing about performance (and art) is that there is no way to gage "did i do a good job" or not 
(so yes, art school was sort of a joke) 
a great art exhibition may get many visitors (or not) 
a fabulous dance performance may get long and loud applause 
or it may be in front of the bathroom mirror 
it can be a whole series of undefinitions 
art cannot be boxed or defined 

dancing alone at home feels very different than dancing in front of my class 
it's been four months 
i haven't personally spoken with everyone in class (about 50 students in here), 
but we have all danced together, witnessed each other dancing and breathing,
and there are a handful of people that i dance, share jokes, and smile with on a weekly basis 
comfortable with each other enough that when it's not dance-class time, i will wonder how they are
but not comfortable enough to give each other hugs when we parted ways today and... i am heading to india (and then, onward!), i don't know when i will return to taiwan, i've really enjoyed dancing with you, i am really grateful for your laughter, openness, and bright eyes, i hope you do wonderful things in this world, i know you will... maybe i should just shove aside awkward social norms, and give you a hug 
too late 
chance has passed 
my final final is over 

before dance, trembling
running over my poem infinite times in my head, my body tense, jerking, sweating through my toes onto the foreign wooden classroom floor (we switched to a different classroom today, and i am not familiar with this wooden floor or the echoes it exudes) 
it always happens like this: 
i like too many things 
i had a list of infinite possibilities for songs 
narrowed it down to 6 songs 
then narrowed it down again to 3 songs 
and now for the past week i have been seesawing between this-or-that-or which song, which perfect song for my heartfilled dance? 
i finally decided on a song this afternoon... half an hour before class begins 

before deciding on the song, choreography is rather impossible 
i just keep my music player cycling through all my possible songs, 
and dance to all of them 
cycling the poem over and over through my body and mind 
trying out new ways of expression with different music
different ways of moving my body infused with "black sea and sky" and "hearts filled with rays of light," etc 
grooving to different rhythms 
then getting bored and frustrated with the poem and the same songs cycled over and over 
and back to "pop" music (frowned upon, for our dance performance!), 
and shaking and grooving my body without any trace of poem left in my mind, 
just mindlessly jumping and shaking to the likes of eminem, hang-drum percussive melodies, and other artists whose names i cannot remember, but their music runs like rebellious fire through my veins, making me waver between wearing all black and wearing the brightest colors i can pull out of my closet, mindless hip and spine gyrations punctuated with knife-like waterfall flower like movements that suddenly drop off some random steep cliff of nowhere and leave me crawling, rolling, and twisting around on the floor like amoeba 

dance performance today
teacher encourages us to move from the spine 
move in ways that allow us to dance with the utmost manifestations of expression
our body speaking louder than words ever could 
while at the same time speaking or singing as clearly (while dancing!) 
that it leaves zero questions in the audience's mind as to 
"wow, she sure can express" 
and 
"i completely understand what is going on here" 
while leaving room for imagination, 
a dancing on all levels 

i want my audience to catch their breath and lose their own heartbeat when they watch me dance 
i want them to get so caught up in the rhythm of my undulating spine and flailing limbs that they forget that their own body is tense with excitement, focused on my dance 
i want to inspire all these other students in class 
to forget about anxiety 
sink into the music
forget everything we learned in class 
and just surrender to all there is in this moment:
music
body
breath
rhythm
(and for this performance... that poem i've been repeating to myself everywhere like a madwoman! getting caught in the poem's tumultuous expressions/ emotions in the subway, biking across town, eating dinner, laughing with friends... this poem has not left my mind for about a month now) 

and it all came together tonight 

i want to share these feelings because today felt simply incredible 
before the performance, while i am trying so hard to create something amazing to share... 
it's actually quite stressful 
and then i layout the bones of my performance 
and the rest is improvisation 
most of it is improvisation, borne of all my endless hours of dancing to song after song, set loose on a sea of rhythm and melody 

i shouted and spat Baudelaire while twisting, jumping, crawling, rolling
i looked my audience in the eye, growled, and howled Baudelaire into the echoing wooden room 
i watched all of the mirrors reflecting my powerful body dressed in black and white 
my heart on top of all the black and white, visible with every trembling movement
dancing on Earth
dancing on Air 
conscious of nothing else but rhythm, poetry, my body, and endless flow of breath and blood pounding through my body
and then, 
the final heaves of my song as i slide onto the Earth, proclaiming the final strains of my Baudelaire poem (i have made it mine, now): 

let us plunge to the depths of the unknown 
to find something 
new 

1.04.2012

happy new year!

Jiling on Seven Star Mountain Peak for 2011 New Year, and 2012 New Year as well! (First time in the same place for two New Years in a row!)

基玲站在七星山上, 2011 和 2012 新年! 

12.21.2011

rain 雨

已經下了一個月的雨了。。。
already a whole month of continual rain... 

感恩朋友!!!
thanks for friends!!! 

12.17.2011

有緣

i met tara and ah ge by chance on my fourth day back in taiwan, and it changed the entire landscape of my journey
(感恩, 阿格拍照!)

12.16.2011

tw ceramics- 2- 台灣陶藝

right after glazing my second batch of ceramic babies, and before firing them up in the blazing kiln! 
sometimes, we learn or think too much... I prefer my first batch 
my third batch is a mystery batch that I will finish during my final weeks of Taiwan; they will be fired while I am in India!